Why aren’t there any good French places near my island? (I call my town my island because it’s mine and it’s self sustaining until we go on vacation excursions.) I tried to stay true to my detox this week but someone bought brie and pie crust. Someone also gave me tons of blueberries, which is superb! So, galettes it is mates! Sometimes there is nothing else that can satisfy my first mates sweet tooth but a pastry pie. I see this recipe on Pinterest all the damn time, but I made it my bitch…. like I do. Also, I know how y’all rascals love that ready made pie crust….it just fits right into your busy schedule. So, here tis the good stuff. Stuff yo face with it:
- 1 package store bought pie crust (comes with 2)
- 2 cups blueberries
- 1/4 cup sugar
- 2 tbsp. cornstarch
- 1 tsp vanilla
- some salt
- 1 egg
- 1 round of brie (man, I love cheese)
- 1 large lemon
- some honey
- some Tuaca ( a shot for the bowl, and a few for yourself)
……the berry magic:
- preheat oven to 425
- mix berries, sugar, cornstarch, zest of the whole lemon, and juice of the lemon, vanilla, a shot of tuaca, and salt in a bowl… mix it good.
- drink a shot….and yell TUACA!!!! Ah, that’s better
- unroll the dough, place a 5 in round bowl, or ramekin, or pastry cutter on the dough and cut circles. Can re roll scraps to make more circles until its gone.
- plop those circles on a sprayed sheet of parchment on a pan
- cut some thin chunks of brie and make a flat bed in the middle of the circles
- spoon about 2 heaping spoonfulls of berry mixture on top of the brie bed in each circle
- fold the edges up over the sides of the filling. About a half inch all the way around, folding and pressing the bottom to keep that shit in place. Tell it who’s the captain!
- make an egg wash with the egg, brush it over the dough.
- shot time… you deserved it! You, my mate, are the tits!
- bake for 15 to 20 min depending on how crisp you want them. Don’t worry about the purple ooze coming out, that’s just the good stuff.. I call it, Ivan Ooze.
Now top these buggars with honey (because honey is the bees knees) and whipped cream if you like….. and make a hot mess! Also great with other fruit and cheeses, savy?! Drink up me hearties YOHO!